Do you ever set boundaries that make you feel uncomfortable?
Too many people do not have a set of values they live by and it shows. They constantly feel exploited, uncertain about their choices or do not know how to handle difficult situations with others.
To be able to set up your own boundaries you first need to know what is important to you. Do you feel like people always exploit your kindness? You probably value fairness and it is time to set some boundaries for yourself.
This can mean having a set of rules you follow. One of these might be ending a friendship when you feel like you are the only one giving in this relationship. It might be difficult or very uncomfortable for you to cut this person off because after all, you like them as a friend. Still, setting and following boundaries means respecting yourself first.
Another expample from my own personal life is freedom. I value it a lot and set it above most things in life, even money. For a long time I thought that the only way to make money is to work at least 40 hours every week. When I moved to another country I realized that this concept isn’t worth it for me.
I started freelancing and had way less money than in my normal 9 to 5, but I also had more personal freedom which I valued and enjoyed way more than anything money could have bought me.
Find out what you value most in your life and set up some rules to actually implement these values into your daily life and protect yourself from a life you do not enjoy.
These ground rules also change over time as your life focus shifts. A college students in the city for example obviously values different things than a mom of two little ones in a suburban area.
Do not be fooled though. Some of these values you come up with are not even your own. A lot of them can come from your parents or other circumstances you lived through. Be aware of where they come from and only accept the ones that stem directly from your heart.
Right now, make the first step towards a better life by sitting down, taking a few moments and writing a list of what is most important to you. You deserve it.
(Here is a list of core values if you need some examples)
Never forget, life is an adventure.